Signals

The university had a department no one could find on the map. Students were sometimes enrolled by mistake. The syllabus contained only questions that had already ruined someone’s life. Exams were silent and self-administered. Those who passed were sent a certificate printed on edible rice paper, which they were

Everything arrives just after it leaves. She hears laughter in rooms that were silent all day. Finds warmth in a cup after the tea has gone cold. The dogs rest at her feet, but only when she isn’t looking. She replies to messages no one sends. Every time she

The hallway wore his coat for three days. It never complained. She replaced the doorknob with a small jar of fog. It worked the same, but colder. The children learned to speak in weather. She nodded when they got the season right. He asked nothing, but rearranged the chairs until

The girl lived under a staircase no one believed existed. It was there — but only sideways. She kept a notebook filled with diagrams of escape tunnels — none of which had ever worked. Once a week, she’d test the walls for kindness. They rarely responded. She was given a bell

A hedgehog opened a custody hearing in a parking garage. No one objected. The filing was done in marmalade. Three witnesses arrived: a left shoe, a decoy duck, and a regret that had been composted improperly. The woman spoke only through interpretive coughing. The man arrived late, wearing a leash

A group of well-dressed ants opened a consultancy firm. They specialised in urgency management. Their motto: Everything is critical, unless it isn’t. They faxed invoices to flowers. Held meetings at the bottom of teacups. Charged by the minute – including pauses for existential doubt. On Holy Saturdays, they wore tiny

A piano was found in a bakery. It played only crusts. Someone ate the sheet music, claiming it tasted like regret with a hint of rosemary. The baker swore he hadn’t ordered a piano, but admitted he had been dreaming in chords since Tuesday. In the alley behind the

A cupboard was found inside a lake. It contained a teaspoon, a half-knitted scarf, and one of those things that might be a seed or a stone, depending on who asks. The lock was made of jelly. The key was missing. A fish claimed responsibility but refused to testify. At

A toaster applied for citizenship. It was denied, but thanked the ministry politely and swallowed a postcard. Somewhere near a fountain that only worked in reverse, a woman sewed buttons onto a cloud and mailed it to herself under a different name. The letter arrived on a Tuesday, but she

The sea level rose but only inside certain houses. On specific Tuesdays. In homes where someone had once said, I’m fine, too many times. Saltwater ruined the paperwork but left the mirrors untouched. A fish was found swimming in a wedding glass. No one knew where it came from.